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okay um
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right i think we'll start a um we were uh uh
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my name is a pedigree no recovery were actually waiting for someone to introduce
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me but i don't think that person's coming so all introduce myself
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uh after five minutes we figured that from the person wasn't coming um
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we're gonna spend about an hour with you look in it what is actually quite a complex area
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uh a little before we before we start because i have such little time mm we'd have to general lies a
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little bit here and there and the come along with me i'll give you some cool little tools and takes
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on how to bridge this cultural gap you know just as a piece of paper in
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front of you always watching use some of you already started answering the questions
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that was really good i'm keen to get going i see that uh would be looking at the case
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later on together a little bit about myself as first of all as anyone seen it before him
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couple people see me before good you probably don't remember anything that doesn't matter anyway yes um
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my family is italian and italians in the room and italians you like football
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ah ha uh_huh
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uh_huh
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that's a we understand each other alright good
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my family's italian they come from the city of nepal eight naples inc is not
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put every heard of happily what is not really famous for be honest
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mafia good it's my parents left they left the u. k. in
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nineteen sixty emigrated to the u. k. so i was
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raised in the u. k. which is why i have this lovely british accents and one for the u. k.
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anywhere from the u. k. from the side of the u. k. this southern english
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accent is quite a powerful accents it makes a sound instantly intelligent huh huh
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do you know that yeah it does your after head starts and instantly intelligent
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um i've been i've been living in norway for the past twenty two years any norwegians in the room
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they're they are great and
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up inevitably to you is geographically these countries are very close together very close to get that
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culturally speaking although they have a lot in common there are some major differences between them
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so i've grown up with primarily to coach as two
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languages in our third culture and the third language
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um and it's not always easy actually
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to kind of reconcile those three couches and that's the kind of thing i'm gonna be talking about it
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uh i travel around the world doing workshops courses helping companies bridge this cultural gap
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what i really do is i help people get along better with people from where culture is often a factor
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and when they say you know can you help us do that can you crate good
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working environments we live we live we work in a an environment of diversity
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how should we deal with that and and in sort of make the most of it and take advantage of it
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i say to them you gotta start with the images the images in your head so gonna play
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a little bit with the images in your head i do a lot of travelling over
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a hundred travel days a year on average it's good and it's bad luck from right i've
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been doing that for nearly thirty years so i've seen pretty much the whole world
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i got the perfect name is a strange to i won't bore you with the details is a
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strange men but basically what i was born my father is a picture of my father
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each one look at me and said display will travel very much i will call him politely don't so you kind of prophesied
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so i became pelican you know he regretted that a little bit
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when the source grandchildren look at these three beautiful italian kate's
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mm rights 'cause you looked at that many looked at being said at the alley said that get out all much is it
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and that line there that funny that lying there tells us something
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important about human beings 'cause it's quite obvious but it's important
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my fall the uh for many many years has had an
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image in his head of how is grandchildren will look
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subconsciously right and that image in the image they did not have blond
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hair and blue ox there's nothing wrong with blond hair blue box
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but it's not the picture he had any said can you see that so then
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you get a gap and when you get the gap you get reactions mm
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it's the gaps that makes life interesting exciting challenging frustration
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difficult i wish it wasn't there and wouldn't it be easy if those kind
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of things is the gaps so it's all about dealing with the gaps
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so what i always say is when the images in front of you don't actually images in your head
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that's what it's all about that's what cultural changes about that's what any formal changes about those
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are the gaps we've got a bridge sup let's look at cultural what is culture
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fifteen seconds turns of the person next to you try and say in one sentence
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what culture is one quick person x. the what is culture in one sentence
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mm
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mm
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mm
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uh_huh
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uh_huh
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okay right it's okay um you probably said things like uh you know it's have
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it says customs is values is norms it's all those things there right
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and it's quite difficult to actually explain and soon you you discover it becomes
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really big you know we talk about aunts coloured language fruit it's everything
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i've got quite a nice definition of coach i hope you like it it's really simple
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and i think it kinda sums up what culture is is is what it is is not nice
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is the way we do things around here are the important part of
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that sentence is the word here and so that also applies
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to organisational cultures well group culture you know you got the finance
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department and the sales department a thinking two completely different ways
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they could be the same nationality from the same town working in the same company but
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you say here in our department is not the same as there in your department
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the way we do things around here okay example
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just think of standing in line him you go into a bank do you understand
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how they stand in line here to get it is not a trick question
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can you see that you press the button here and there are numbers you wait appear rights you get it
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everybody's column how about this system of standing in line to get it to pull the piece of
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paper wait for the number these two seem to fall column what about this one how
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uh_huh
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mm right so this is taking a prism looking your reaction well might not let says
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that's it that's the gap that image is not the same as the image in my head
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and this one isn't even difficult to understand is it is not even
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complicated and it's also really tangible you can see and touch it
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this is the easiest level of the ball and yet you get that reaction what
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about the things you can see like other people's values can see those
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they're really trickle to do it so i'm gonna try give it the system today on how to deal with that so it's about the images
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in front of you when they don't match images yet as scandinavians
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raise your hand that's yeah and nordic spiny fins in
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the room anyone for finland anything's one feign great loving it on your own or just anyway that it is
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we got to the nordic countries standing in line is that very interesting concept i live in norway
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that's the image of a perfect q. in norway what's important here is the is the distance
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but this is right guys and these are things you don't think about you just
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know instinctively that distance is really important that distance is even more important
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that's a crucial the students so what i like to do often in norway guys i like
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to stand behind allegiance and i like to test the this rule by doing that
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we're talking centimetres but that is enough to make that person feel
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uncomfortable and and the game is how far can i go
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before i get the action yeah uh_huh yes
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mm anyone from india from anywhere from india here at the back there you go so
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was it in the last year that killing system the images completely different look at this this is a very
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i don't know what's going on here mm
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right uh_huh ha
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huh alright
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maybe
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ah yes
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or finland mm or finland finland effect and if you like
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space phyllis applies to go without it at home
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this is the can't really gave us knock at we remember nokia connecting people i think that's really ironic how
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really ironic uh i was uh in uh i was having a mail in helsinki not long ago
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trying to connect with the person next to me and it was clear we had two completely different images
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on how we talk conversations because italians we just
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we we have a tendency just to talk
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say something silence is silence is deaf
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just talks anything just say the fame
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appeared to me to be like the kind of person that thinks if i don't have
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anything valuable to say don't say a white pollute the where the world with her
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so i thought right let me try on asking a simple question maybe i'll
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get a reaction i'll listen to his reaction and follow up the words
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in his sentences really simple yeah i said have you lived in helsinki or
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life he replied by saying not yet ha ha isn't really stray
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and we get these things all the time these these different images and i like to test people images of me
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i like to say this to people this is my favourite phrase which
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i try to sneak in what i talk to strangers usually airports
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when i say this with by southern british accent it usually works quite well you can trust me
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i could hear the scope of authority and aplomb as we call it in english as a nice word
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you can transmit i was at the airport once in the lounge guy said i just need to go to the toilet could you watch with back show
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you contrast means that nobody some forgotten because norwegians i i sometimes i pretend
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i'm norwegian works quite well the norwegian accent to you controls me
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well from all right yeah if yeah
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is the last one the gets the reactions are
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would you like to hear it you don't need to hear it 'cause the images dark in your head
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listen to it can hear it can hear your reaction as well you could ask the ah
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decide i'm from italy you contrast with a problem mm how uh_huh
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mm isn't really crazy i'm the same person saying the same words in three
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different ways three different actions any germans anyone from germany or germany
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be honest if i said it with a german accent or italian accent which would you
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trust the most uh germans german yeah okay are you sure about that ah yes
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uh_huh be careful don't fall into the traps right at the end and germans italians all of
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that we've you know the germans get really annoyed with this combo on that's not fair
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this is six chairman engineer is doing something bad in spoiling it for
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many many many other people writes its own fat message or
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is good then you know what it's like to be an italian or not to trust it is the same feeling yeah
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because i know why um i've got to use you see yourself myself images another
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part of the code to use you would like to be seen you've
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got it to we spend a lot of time and energy in a circle
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and the law circle is called the user there's actually see them
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when i say you can trust me those three circles stick
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together quite closely there's a close correlation between the three
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myself image one trying to be you know you see me kind of match each other can you see that
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what is it you contrast me and you'll off this happens
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and that is the this is the process of misunderstanding cross cultural misunderstanding it's
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being miss perceive misunderstood and funny joke aside it's a little bit painful
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you contrast the uh_huh good we're not laughing as much in uh
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and and pain comes in different forms it could be confusion frustration could be anger
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if you've ever been at home with your loved one had an argument and your loved one
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says something to you which is really unfair and you click you know you you just
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is that ever happened to that's not feeling of that loss or cool being ripped away
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so bridging the gap in culture is really about moving that circle back into
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the middle how do you do that well it's about understanding the images
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i'm providing images for the other person you know they will like that they will see as familiar
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it's a process of adaptation
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okay we'll have a look at this as well arrived in norway ninety five cut the i wanna talk about that this whole idea
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of adapting yourself changing being willing to change is a really important
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part of bridging coated apps before i went to norway
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i've always stood on the stage of so the stage for for a very long time but i didn't
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always have a suit and i wasn't always ate consultant i used to play in a band
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yeah i played in a band quite good band the band was we were invited to to warm up for
00:15:08
really good band in nineteen ninety three a band called you to you might have heard of them yeah
00:15:13
i took this photograph grave wrote a note of the eighty thousand other
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to see ass but i don't care it's a great voter
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shortly after this i play the concert in norway okay i'm just giving a quick idea
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of the life i had there and that a norwegian a very sweet norwegian
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who uh move with me to england was there for two years of the two years she
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said i'd i'd like to go back to norway can you come with the we
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were on holiday that's i'm we having a holiday in the sight of italy and she
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was telling me come to norway it's a lovely place you should really given
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mm i will make you happy and all that stuff from which to change the potential change
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a life i had to be on the wooden bats in the movies gap plus
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was sitting on a beach in norway signal to be genetically here and i was thinking
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to myself what would it be each in all we look like right now
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i'd like you all to imagine a beach unknowing and not allegiance 'cause they know what it looks like
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the only image that came up in my head was this one here right huh
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mm mm
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it shouldn't but it does 'cause we were sitting on a different place on
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this beautiful beach in the southern coast of italy or is it
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is this italy
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this is normally uh_huh and it's just a a kind of a simple way with the message to challenge those
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images again people have this so called culturally televisions they
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are constantly challenging their own images in it
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and that's what i have to do with you let's start with a quick challenge of you know less the little exercise put yourself in this situation
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you're the passenger in a car which is being driven by your best friend your best friend is driving the car and
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everybody imagine that best friend say best friends naming i hate
00:17:02
to use f. k. u. friend hits a pedestrian
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it's an accident as no alcohol involved no drugs look it's it's an accident
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you know your friends driving it fifty in the thirties um there's
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no doubt in your head about that okay no question
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there are no witnesses saying
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and your friends list as if you were to testify no think all the frames driving
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of thirty might save your best friend from serious consequences everybody understand the situation
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he comes the question what are likely to didn't know turns of
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the person next you don't say anything don't say anything at
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turn to the person next to you don't tell them if you would lie that's easy
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try to guess if the person next to you will you will what's in this situation
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and see if you're right see if you guess right just spend a half a minute doing that mm mm
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uh_huh
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yeah
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uh_huh
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okay
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oh okay right
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um by all means talk about this case soft words to tell you know it tell each other why you would do you think was
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it easy to guess what the person next to you said obviously
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if you know that person well your guess pretty clearly but
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what would be interesting to do we don't have time to look at the dynamics people who don't know each other when you're facing
00:19:49
across someone to what extent are you being influenced by those images that you've heard before
00:19:57
how relevant all day okay this is actually being done is quite a well known survey
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right um by the way do you think i would lie for my best friend
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you contrast the right the uh_huh terrible that so difficult um i'll
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be honest with you i would not lie for my front
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no i would not a surprise you had you asked me twenty two years ago before with no way i would have said yes
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twenty two years and always has done something to me it's also
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a each with age comes responsibility and all that stuff
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but i have absolutely been influenced by my norwegian surroundings a society of high
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levels of trust basically to keep it simple thank you norwegians right yeah
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and uh and this is what i think you know being exposed to environments it's almost impossible not to
00:20:49
be influenced by the environment because we are creatures of adaptation as well at that into my environment
00:20:56
but it's been done let me show you here uh i hope you can see the countries 'cause
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the quite small but percentage of respondents you said they would probably not lie in court
00:21:04
actually i wonder could we have the peaks big picture of just the results in
00:21:08
that you don't need to see me a great thank you that's ever look
00:21:12
we've got finland sweden norway germany u. k. poland
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france italy india brazil china russia venezuela nigeria
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not all your countries out there but you know instinctively where your country is right
00:21:26
and you know definitely what your country is primarily blue all primarily read it
00:21:33
it doesn't mean they hear you as an individual are primarily blue or red that's another story
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okay but raise your hand if you come from a primarily blue country
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take a look around primarily read country primarily right
00:21:51
you guys are great you guys it definitely right you're definitely right okay so you're talking to each other why uh whether right or
00:21:58
your red ha okay good i can i is it true to say
00:22:07
that people from nigeria all less on list then people from sweden
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the answer is no it's tempting to look at that i go well look at the facts and figures
00:22:24
that's that's that's the job for the media the media does that right course not i've
00:22:28
done this in nigeria anyone from nigeria probably anyone from there we go great
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i've done this many times in nigeria actually and it's true i mean most nigerians say
00:22:41
yes i would too but not one single nigerian thinks it's good to
00:22:45
lighten lying is a universal bad from all over the world
00:22:51
but if you ask nigerians why they are more likely
00:22:55
then you get the real lots of this these results why it's because blue coaches have high interest in
00:23:01
the system would it be guess wealth or to use the system the rules the justices them
00:23:07
uh it doesn't mean is perfect but we believe it can be perfect and basically the more you go this way
00:23:13
the less you believe in uh in red couches people are not treated
00:23:17
the same it's not equal treatment everybody doesn't work like that
00:23:22
and i'm gonna talk a little bit about the consequences so if we can get both screens back up
00:23:26
to us the question why when you asked that question why enough times you'll come to this
00:23:31
that behind the behaviour there's usually strength as well as we there's all there's a positive intention was like all it often
00:23:37
so nigerian just say yes i would lie they don't even use the word lie they say no i yeah i would protect my friend
00:23:45
and i think this is the first step to bridging cultural gaps is actually looking at the
00:23:50
different in each which you may not even like or agree with and say okay
00:23:54
let's put aside what i believe about it and try to take
00:23:57
for what the positive intentional the string fees behind it
00:24:02
what is it that doing doesn't make it writes your job is to understand to bridge the gap
00:24:10
i've got this i've got this formula in life which have to be a long time to come up with this formulate so simple
00:24:16
but basically people we've coated intelligence if we use that term they
00:24:21
have some that the first of all they curious people
00:24:25
a curious they open up and i think let's explore why let me find out
00:24:32
they're also brave let me explain what i mean by brave separate because they're willing to go into someone else's world
00:24:39
i see what it's like it's also brave because what often happens is when you understand that the people
00:24:44
get inside the world sometimes you find out that way you did it wasn't actually that good
00:24:50
the perhaps they did it a better way it's brave as well it's much safer to sit
00:24:55
in your box and think this is the way we've done its work forever it's great
00:24:59
get inside the other person and when you have those two together you are
00:25:02
that with this respect which i haven't spell incorrectly respect i'm i'm
00:25:07
the language person so like words i love the etymology of words and
00:25:12
we look at the word respect it means to look again
00:25:16
can you see that return rewiring repeat spectator spectacle respect means what
00:25:21
you just it just now the way you do things
00:25:24
is not the way i would do if i don't like the way you do it if i'm really honest
00:25:30
but before a judge you i'm willing at least to look at you again from a new angle and see if
00:25:34
i can understand that these what you're trying to achieve let me try to understand why you did that
00:25:39
'cause if i get y. u. d. d. i. can attack it from a different angle and
00:25:43
the only way to do that is to come into contact them be curious about you
00:25:47
respect does not mean agree it does not mean except some respect is respect
00:25:53
look again and you're looking for these positive intentions as a lot of talk about global mindset
00:25:59
what is global mindsets and what is its flexibility of the moment
00:26:05
it's tolerance for ambiguity i don't know they're all they're all a black and white aunts is
00:26:13
okay it's the up is the ability to adapt to a given example any sweets in the room
00:26:20
is is even more relevant today right but those are all interested in
00:26:24
football uh sweden not that it's really in the qualifying yesterday evening
00:26:30
so's we that are going to the world cup in russia and
00:26:34
italy or not for the first five to sixty years
00:26:37
big national tragedy okay even if you're not interested in football you
00:26:40
can understand that's quite a blow to us congratulations weights
00:26:46
mm one thing italians there we win graciously and we lose graciously that's how it
00:26:51
is what was it like if we do this a lot in italy
00:26:57
okay swayed speed you know that you were known as the germans or the north from
00:27:02
uh_huh it's not my phrase it's a common phrase in my business the germans
00:27:06
a lot that you know this sweets to you like that term
00:27:11
and not really having no offence to the germans
00:27:17
they don't like that i've never met a single swede who like that term next question why are you refer
00:27:22
to as the germans and off i wonder why that is any any can you enlighten us sweets
00:27:29
they like order they like discipline their risk
00:27:33
averse that detail oriented that very
00:27:38
very careful uh_huh you saw that yes they even did you see that
00:27:43
he possible it was like the yellow will the berlin you just couldn't get past it
00:27:49
and i say brilliant i'm so glad sweets uh like that because without those
00:27:53
qualities this company would never worked as well as it does right
00:27:58
that's what it's about it's about flipping the negative side step positives
00:28:02
what is it that they bring to us those real working in a diverse workplace
00:28:07
it's all about managing the strength of people what is it they do what can they bring
00:28:12
to the mix that was missing before what this is what managing diversity is about
00:28:17
it's focusing on strengths it's not ignoring the weaknesses
00:28:21
but is focusing on strengths so let's talk about some of the strings first of all blue coaches
00:28:25
trust insistence i know i'm generalising read couches the trusting people why because this isn't still work
00:28:34
i was on hold in the side of italy around the naples area just being read from the very special
00:28:40
part of italy it does not speak for the whole of it sleep is a very special region okay
00:28:45
trying to park a car in norway already blue culture if you
00:28:49
wanna paw caught their systems therapy signs they're all white
00:28:52
lines on the road their apps there'll machines you don't need to talk to a single person to park your car
00:28:58
everything works that that that that that barrier goes up when you put it to get in is fantastic
00:29:05
doesn't quite work like that yeah and you get things done
00:29:09
three people you get somebody who could influence you'll world
00:29:13
and you strike up a relationship with them as quickly as possible and you try to get them to like you
00:29:22
i was there on holiday with my wife and three kids could find anywhere to park i see this lovely woman here
00:29:27
to see what job she has just the ticket attended parking i woke up to her i happen to speak
00:29:33
this dialect from the naples area just not quite italian
00:29:38
i speak the strange dialect alone i got home start speaking this language uh
00:29:42
say is that a parking place to deceive not so my question
00:29:46
she says uh what did you learn to speak and up and down is very nice
00:29:50
i learned from my father my mother really what are they from every start talking
00:29:55
i come from village to village elder at the mountaineers a couple you really should come from the same village is my parents
00:30:01
really what you'll you'll pay eases your key it's your wife you want even my wife's in the car thinking what the hell is he doing yeah
00:30:09
he said he was gonna eyes for a parking space just pointing at a watch
00:30:16
you know i 'cause she's no time is money no no not in right coaches time is
00:30:24
an opportunity to build bombs which is the best guaranteeing contract in life you and me
00:30:30
you see in red coaches if people live uh oh you feel
00:30:34
you own like you know help you preferably all three
00:30:39
she doesn't only off a an a but i can get her to like me that's what we
00:30:44
couldn't some of the five minutes of cheeky chatty she likes me i can feel it
00:30:51
she says what is your question i said is that a parking place jesus
00:30:56
shouldered but don't park your car bad why not is too expensive
00:31:02
she's thinks he's telling me it's too expensive really was or the back
00:31:06
you got all the data where and she points to assign
00:31:10
uh_huh sure right
00:31:14
i stopped smiling about didn't know waylon every come on
00:31:18
just as is your money or the what you like you spend forty order but if you park your car
00:31:22
that i will give you a parking fine for the auto you wanna say that's ah ha ha there
00:31:31
hum hum
00:31:35
uh_huh great uh where you from italy sir
00:31:40
where from where from the north is just as shocked as you
00:31:44
guys there is the mm it's very different yeah wow
00:31:51
very different about my current also local about parking regions that
00:31:58
they know why because you we'll is on the line
00:32:01
well i've taught me in all it's very simple the role is very simple you cannot have
00:32:05
any of the black rubber tire on the line it must be inside the box
00:32:09
the back of the car can hang over the line that's okay but the the law i you know this is the all blue coaches know the rules
00:32:17
i didn't move the car it'll come on what difference does that make it did i get a fine yeah there it is
00:32:28
but i used to feel sorry for may no not really uh_huh
00:32:33
uh_huh wow it's so different isn't it ah it's so different
00:32:40
blues watch the clock rates watch the relationship and this is important as well there's
00:32:49
a there's a there's a kind of an internal in patients in blue cultures
00:32:54
we wanna get things done we wanna get things done we wanna get things done
00:32:58
we uh budgets in quarterly results and get things done correct
00:33:03
red's notice of may use it to their advantage and they just delay things
00:33:09
just been a okay stressed out and then no got their start putting their prices than
00:33:14
yeah that's how it works that's how it works uh_huh uh_huh uh_huh back to
00:33:23
this story and i tried to talk my way out of a fine
00:33:29
that's the red reaction toll let's talk about you and me we talk i
00:33:33
to or i i will find your soul talk to your soul
00:33:38
we will work decide together that's what rights do not just the
00:33:41
times rates all over the world it's relationship oriented it's talking
00:33:46
i recommend you watch a fantastic movie an iranian movie called
00:33:50
separation it's about divorce where that the man them father
00:33:56
and the mother spend the whole movie talking to a judge
00:34:00
to influence the charge toward custody of the child
00:34:04
it's a fascinating movie or just it's a great movie anyway but the way they use
00:34:08
it through speaking it's not black and whites so said right i'm gonna call in
00:34:15
to the office and told why why identifying him my wise reaction was of
00:34:20
course oh i called in i said id decomposition in english not norwegian
00:34:28
even those big originated in english white because you can trust me british
00:34:33
i receive the fine yes i can hear him only commuted
00:34:37
is it because your wee little malone it must be inside the box i said
00:34:42
oh no my wife is feeling sick i'm sorry about that i stop
00:34:44
the car had together inside the cafe i wasn't thinking on never do it
00:34:48
again i understand it's recorded but you will most beings like the box
00:34:53
the rules must be the save everybody mm i never she was sick
00:34:57
and pregnant and all this is true sick pregnant or stressed
00:35:01
i'm sorry on everything together i've learned my lesson or one of them is recorded i really do both you real most people
00:35:08
listen i she's sick pregnant we just built a house cash flows really low listen if this is how
00:35:14
sure are never do it again if i do it again i keep my name on your system
00:35:18
if i do it again send me ten fines that's our show or ion i'll never do it again
00:35:25
uh that is very creative solutions or whatever i have not heard that one before
00:35:31
bought the wheel motions of uh guys are moving yeah i can't
00:35:35
get to is all this this kind of screen of cool
00:35:40
systematic for soft and which is how blues often perceived by rates
00:35:46
because would this lot is no one is that he it's
00:35:51
and the guy says that they missed the recording or your italian uh
00:35:56
i am a bit italian why do you like football for paul
00:36:01
finally i'm through can you see that i'm talking to the person the reds want to reach the person inside who
00:36:08
is the person inside not your position i know you position
00:36:12
the person i trust i've broken through selloff opal
00:36:18
you look he says to me you like football well mister record it's just like football inaudible must be over the line
00:36:25
how we're mostly insight about
00:36:28
uh_huh
00:36:31
that's blue mm
00:36:34
crazy huh it's crazy
00:36:37
and then when you actually communicate how do we communicate swedish fumble manager uh_huh
00:36:42
as a very different way of communicating is feelings to i and italian or regular just think blue and red
00:36:49
uh is taken from a norwegian t. v. program so there are subtitles you don't need to understand the subject
00:36:54
was you're basically saying manages join a game how they react to goals being scored goals being missed
00:37:00
uh agreeing with the referee disagreeing with the referee you'll get the idea okay
00:37:05
oh look at this coming up now i'm half
00:38:08
i i
00:38:12
i i right
00:38:17
they're very different
00:38:20
or
00:38:22
i don't i am not saying that one is better than the other of course i i'm glad this will be it's only
00:38:27
because quite frankly it's sleepy rubbish recently right they deserve is
00:38:31
good but what it was just says is that column
00:38:35
gets results to do it is that i'm not saying that this is
00:38:39
the magic formula and and i bridged the gap living in scandinavia
00:38:44
by turning down my redness turning it that because it works better calm
00:38:53
works best in always take or um
00:38:58
especially in conflict stick on talk about to cool on mistakenly really long fine yeah
00:39:05
'cause culture is not an on off switch unless you've grown in a a
00:39:09
family with two coaches you you cannot switch it on and off
00:39:13
it takes time to adapt yeah it just doesn't feel you uh and
00:39:20
our them but when we got married in this i think of the normal way of us uh it was just a
00:39:26
quite calm ceremony there was seventy guess they're sixty five norwegians five italian so it's quite common
00:39:33
another receptions the norwegians telling each other how wonderful these and and this is what my fall the hurt
00:39:39
this is what he heard it does mean it was like this but this is what my fault uh
00:39:44
listen to the sixty five norwegians this is what my father he heard
00:39:49
he was speed difference here he's task prior to sell just beautiful the priest was
00:39:55
fantastic was like his p. e. heard you heard sixty five people whispering
00:40:02
return to babysit but idealistic this is a wedding or a funeral is high
00:40:09
that's a typical misinterpretation between
00:40:13
because the pictures all different in your head so i'm gonna test these images of oslo but you will see little
00:40:20
case in front to i just wanna give you five minutes trying to huddle close together at push chairs together
00:40:27
have a look at this case somebody already started reading it
00:40:30
see if what i've said so far provides any insights
00:40:34
into somebody else's here okay five minutes then five just five six minutes to have a look at that
00:40:43
uh_huh
00:40:50
uh_huh
00:40:53
uh_huh
00:40:56
mm uh_huh uh_huh
00:47:50
oh okay
00:47:54
let me um
00:47:57
let me jump in there are i realise that you haven't finished artist i it's just
00:48:02
i wanted to give a little taste of a typical the interaction i should mention that this
00:48:07
is a really oh this is a real story simplified to make a case obviously
00:48:12
this is a real interaction and as you can see it's an interaction with is
00:48:16
just it's a misunderstanding of images on there just to save a little
00:48:23
bit of to go around the room with a microphone to get all your comments on that but for in the in the interest of of time
00:48:30
if i just go through and and put forth some of the most common replies of how
00:48:34
to this case around the world and you can see yourselves with you agree right
00:48:38
how appropriate was it for the that's also for job restored to there's nothing wrong
00:48:42
with asking everybody does the whole world the blues to german this veins norwegians
00:48:49
brits this is how we get jobs and we asked people for them and
00:48:53
we give jobs the people we know through that works sometimes recording headhunters
00:48:58
you find them for us but it's basically we it's no it's all about how you ask
00:49:03
and the point about as a blue would ask in a way that
00:49:06
you don't feel as if you have to you can say no
00:49:10
rates without releasing the last the favour some people they know and this is himself
00:49:15
you can't say no and they don't realise that and you can't say no
00:49:22
and if you look at right coach is one of the biggest problems a
00:49:24
basis in red is it's much more difficult to say no to people
00:49:29
especially relationships or people above you in the hierarchy you have power over your life
00:49:36
uh_huh blues don't have to do that so much survey that
00:49:41
asked for question in a way that feels a little
00:49:44
bit pressure the icons i know why this way up levy has a right to us phones for this favour
00:49:51
well the that blues the because is known for ten years these these are relationship come on that's what we do
00:49:58
i've been a little work if you've a tiny is in fact on the batteries to have to come and ask you for this favour
00:50:04
you should have seen it by now yeah and asked me but i have a duty to my daughter my family to help
00:50:12
or now i'm taking you for a job i'm talking from the head of it out that doesn't make it right
00:50:19
when side view that's had that anyone did anyone see that it never did
00:50:23
anyone see this year he's in terrorist to have to go and ask
00:50:28
you should know what do you think that has good reason to be of added what do you think it does a lot it doesn't matter
00:50:36
it's the emotion you have to do with and is emotion is i am offended
00:50:41
and you cannot ally a good feelings don't lie you can't say to someone no you're not offended
00:50:48
yes i am i'm tired no you're not from it's the motion you have to deal with it will be
00:50:56
impressed got together at all but yet he does he feels he has a right to be offended
00:51:02
one of the that's positive intentions there at least three he wants to help
00:51:07
restore to he was to help himself he wants to help the
00:51:09
company you want to save the company money because it's cost a lot of money to recruit people you don't have to do that
00:51:16
and you could go on there are many more positive intentions white doesn't his boss see the positive intentions
00:51:22
the simple answer is is not looking for them is boss is not a bad person at all
00:51:29
his boss is kind of stalking his little blue picture and sees the
00:51:33
world through these blue spectacles which in the situation is not
00:51:38
helpful it's very helpful in other situations but not this one here v.
00:51:44
that is not innocent he's been there long enough to know this
00:51:49
so if you feel that i'm got on the outside i'm not of it outside that both to blame
00:51:54
it's an interaction between two people and that's one of the most important things in diversity environments you know
00:52:01
it's the responsibility of everyone to be aware not just the
00:52:06
minority the minority as well needs to be aware
00:52:09
how can i bridge the gap do thing fronts could've handled the situation better yes
00:52:15
he is a is a possible lots of the past also i ever heard from my group so
00:52:19
my workshops came from a guy uh it was seen it happen actually in singapore uh_huh
00:52:28
and they also when something like this and he said this person said to be five being the possible said thank you for the c. v.
00:52:35
it's very nice of you to bring it to me first i appreciate that sorry i
00:52:39
haven't been to you i know you told is looking for a job listen
00:52:43
if this one my company i give or job like that it's not unfortunately
00:52:50
we have very strict strict rules regulations so i can't just give or job
00:52:54
his what i suggest you do i suggest should give the c. v.
00:52:57
due to alternate oscar to apply yourself i can let the h. r.
00:53:00
department know that it's coming nothing wrong with that can't guarantee job
00:53:06
the two that in fact i if i helped you to help your door to get a job it would look
00:53:13
bad on your toll to if anybody found that it would backfire on or so we don't want that's all
00:53:19
so the best thing for her in this environment is to get her to apply room
00:53:24
if that doesn't work combat somebody will go to plan b. hope she gets a job that's it and i and i
00:53:32
thought was a great aunts that because each talks a perfect balance between a red and blue you're not telling lies
00:53:38
you're not losing your integrity you still yourself but you adapt
00:53:42
to new communication style to suit the target audience
00:53:47
there are lots of grace systems out there to help you do this i suggest you google some these they're very easy to find
00:53:53
um his one that i'd it to preparing for beating this one cousin erin maya
00:53:58
aaron myers writing a lot at the moment uh especially for the harvard business review
00:54:02
she's written about connecticut culture lap which i suggest you read very useful collide
00:54:09
if you set up that this quadrant here if we put this look emotionally an expressive and
00:54:13
emotionally expressive have one line there and on the other line we put confrontational which means
00:54:19
not afraid to disagree it doesn't mean you punch people right yeah it means you're not afraid to go in
00:54:25
and disagree and avoid confrontation this one because i'm quite interesting
00:54:31
uh and this is based on their minds research over here you've got countries like italy spain russia france
00:54:37
could use can everybody see the countries by the way what we need to experiments should reach of the big picture yeah baby yes
00:54:44
we asked the guys that could be a big picture yeah big picture there we go great so we can see liza then we'll countries
00:54:55
like the netherlands germany this is quite interesting not afraid to disagree with
00:54:59
you and tell you very directly but in a calm way
00:55:04
that makes sense was the guys at the top of the talking general are genuine generalising here was a
00:55:10
the pattern of behaviour there is disagree and do it very you know very hallway
00:55:14
and here we have countries like brazil india mexico saudi arabia the philippines
00:55:21
lots of the motions of expressive thus the avoiding that
00:55:25
confrontation and then here in this corner here right
00:55:30
emotionally on expressive it's all about control and it's all about avoiding confrontation in public very useful
00:55:36
quadrants this stuff is easy to find it very useful before you go into meetings
00:55:41
if these two guys it had this cauldron say or like uh put the blue red you can see the obvious parts of their imagine if they'd be in
00:55:48
look at these to write this is what's happening here from because the indian in addition
00:55:55
to this the the guy from india here if he fits into this parking
00:55:59
is is perception of the german is that he's this interest it does a lot of
00:56:04
talk ability doesn't care which is not the chief perception of a germ of union
00:56:12
is he's why's it gets so hot and and obviously irritated but doesn't say what's
00:56:18
really on his mind and these uh two different pictures and it causes confusion
00:56:27
and all you need is a little system like this to help you
00:56:29
navigate these signals right this is what helps bridge the gap
00:56:33
there's another really useful model like that i don't have some of you see ms it's created by a guy called richard lewis
00:56:40
a u. k. company reaches communications based on colours you'll notice there's another colour that it's blue red and yellow
00:56:47
very useful model going to go this call i i use a small
00:56:51
the lot it's very simplistic it does not cover all the bases
00:56:56
but it's very useful and you'll get things that they are not gonna go
00:56:59
through the table you can find this really easily richard the louis culture
00:57:05
and these are typical patterns of behaviour in communication styles
00:57:09
with each colour okay the rigidly was active modern
00:57:15
uh i i've do testing with people profile testing this is a very large group or looked at
00:57:20
they're all engineers they're all from all over the world there about four hundred people did this test
00:57:25
so a lot of people end up on the same place wanna make it very clear that
00:57:30
these three guys on norwegian one of them is typically norwegian the other two aren't
00:57:37
just as these two guys here are both brazilian one of them is kind of typically brazilian the other
00:57:42
one is not i'm very aware of this but i so the bottle describes patterns of behaviour
00:57:48
now what we're looking at the yellows what is a reactive coach
00:57:53
of basically we've already seen it it's about diplomacy over
00:57:56
truth because of the lead the the lack of wanting to
00:58:00
go into open confrontation you get a lot of diplomacy
00:58:04
if you know what you have to read between the lines the typical one here
00:58:10
this is this explains the behaviour saying yes when perhaps you mean no
00:58:16
oh in no way i had a visitor from a business uh a client
00:58:20
visit from japan and i can see cross country and then he'll
00:58:24
so i thought you know maybe the car i would like to try some skiing would you like to try some skiing
00:58:33
here and he said love that okay it off one it was clear
00:58:36
within the minute the guy i haven't really tried skiing before
00:58:40
i said have you skied before any said yes but not exactly uh_huh
00:58:48
no no sir is fantastic yeah mm that's no somebody
00:58:56
gave is never confront must not lose face
00:58:59
this is an interesting one statements all promises these these characteristics are all in that table or should you
00:59:06
other people say to be heard when oh when my my chinese counterpart
00:59:11
means yes when they say yes amino when you say yes
00:59:15
uh and i've lost so many people from china how they did how do you know when yeses
00:59:19
yes yes is no and they say things like you can see it in the ali's
00:59:25
neck and neck and yeah you can hear it in the voice
00:59:30
they have these codes that are almost impossible to learn right
00:59:35
the best way to know whether yeses yes or no is no is to get them
00:59:39
to make a statement so forget yes no questions they don't work at all don't
00:59:45
say can you deliver this by friday a yes
00:59:51
uh_huh what does that mean instead say
00:59:56
when can you deliver this uh_huh uh how and then if you get if
01:00:02
they can us that's a little that's my advice to people to get you try to
01:00:07
get them to commit to statements whether written written is the best that as a
01:00:11
challenge trying get it in writing you get them to make statements you you turn
01:00:17
around a whole way of thinking blues have a tendency to to think efficiency
01:00:21
can you do it yes yes means yes no means no maybe means maybe the bottle patients it's all
01:00:29
about patients he's a really good one look must
01:00:32
not lose face mm nancy adler canadian researcher
01:00:38
costs people put the for statement to people manager should have precise ounces
01:00:43
to most of the questions people ask them about their work do you agree
01:00:47
i think about that in your working environments how important is it
01:00:52
for a manager to know things to have control of um
01:00:59
when they don't have control or don't know the also
01:01:02
how easy or difficult is it to you'll admit to others you don't know think about the new work environment
01:01:11
what came out from her or an unstable as research was
01:01:14
this is quite clear look in norway sweden netherlands
01:01:21
what that means is when i manage it doesn't know that manages simply says i do not know
01:01:26
but i can find a full year i get back to you and nobody thinks any less of you
01:01:33
as you go progressively this way that becomes much more difficult to admit you don't know
01:01:37
you don't have control you haven't got ever really tight control on the budgets
01:01:44
i used to work with a company that did safety standards ship building ship yards it
01:01:49
was so difficult to get koreans who also for the the southern koreans shipyards
01:01:54
when they made mistakes on the building shapes they didn't let you know and even though you said
01:01:59
listen just let us know now because if we fix it now it costs a hundred dollars
01:02:03
but if we fix it in three months time that's gonna cost a million dollars it's
01:02:08
okay it was unbelievable how difficult it was to say listen we made a mistake
01:02:14
and so they began a whole cultural change how do we change people's images
01:02:18
and the basic images when i make a mistake it's okay i do any could put
01:02:26
the colours of the model in there just to fit the main okay to
01:02:29
give you an idea of what's going on here can anyone see a pattern here
01:02:34
was the pattern can you see the patently apart from the blue and red
01:02:38
is there anything yeah what makes it difficult to admit mistakes can anyone see about in the countries it's
01:02:46
to do with hierarchical hierarchy is a killer of truth hierarchy is the colour of the truth
01:02:54
the nordic countries and all of european it's all about small what because small
01:02:58
partisans reducing the hierarchy the lower the hierarchy the less the fear
01:03:03
what happens of course is you go to red and yellow coaches is that power distance 'cause
01:03:07
i'd like to give a pretty an example from the country that i live in uh
01:03:11
in all of this was completely new to me guys before i came to
01:03:14
know i didn't know this exist it's like a from an italian
01:03:19
patriarchal family the where the father and the mother never online
01:03:26
and it's interesting and i even if you don't
01:03:28
like football yesterday was it was just a cultural case
01:03:32
study you've got it's highly and manager to just
01:03:36
it refuses to admit these no good and he still thinks is gonna carry
01:03:44
on his contract even no no the whole world them most italians
01:03:48
nobody's rubbish right he still clinging onto it because it's that picture of
01:03:55
admitting failure is so difficult to do this is a great pitch
01:04:02
are they to explain to your to show you what for um a small power this is looks like this page was taken in nineteen
01:04:08
seventy three in oslo i need to explain the normal regions of the
01:04:11
other guys watch their faces what i tell the story watch
01:04:15
this is nineteen seventy three there was an old embargo will prices nobody could get fuel
01:04:20
we have power cuts all over the world i remember as a kid that the t. v. would just go off at night we were looking
01:04:27
for candles to light has is so this is all slow all of
01:04:32
no way norwegians a toll on this day to save a few
01:04:36
t. they could do that but i'm not driving that car don't drive the car take the bus or
01:04:41
the train or walk so what these people are on the train in oslo including this guy here
01:04:48
and this person here on the train buying it take it is the key the kenya
01:04:53
of norway to cool story at the the king of norway ask yourself a question
01:05:01
clicking or president or prime minister or porn person you'll country do
01:05:04
that uh_huh and if they did it would you believe it
01:05:09
uh_huh distribution still going on today this is one of the
01:05:14
what they call the nordic model of society it's about
01:05:17
reducing this hierarchies as much as you can if it the you've wanted and thought that
01:05:22
nordic seem to be a bit sort of laid back in quite relaxed about
01:05:26
life it is not just because they are good social welfare assistance is because they
01:05:31
have work environments where they've reduced the fear as much as they can
01:05:34
there's still some left but is pretty good is then traditions caring of today this is the norwegian prime minister today
01:05:43
going shopping in oslo the bodyguard is standing just outside the camera shot i know
01:05:49
but the fact that she's going along with this at the shopping basket no surveys just on around it's
01:05:55
fantastic this picture was taken for just before she became prime minister this is a purse um hum
01:06:03
right
01:06:05
this is the person i can talk to them mm this is what time
01:06:11
magazine writes about what it talks about the nordic model this is it
01:06:16
this is a person i could talk to because they let you and they all rights same person was in
01:06:24
new york two months ago united nations after a hard day work she needs to relax a bit
01:06:30
look at this image guys and ask yourself what the image ever be published in my country other prime minister
01:06:36
this person's allowing an image of her in every day life looking will this
01:06:43
is this is the image that we used to write i put
01:06:48
a bomb on these japanese emperor i keep them look at the barrel
01:06:51
very important that they had must be below the emperor's head right
01:06:55
back home in the united states upon because so much criticism for this
01:07:00
why is he bowing down to the japanese it per euro distaste
01:07:05
isn't bad and everybody this whole idea of equality and
01:07:11
these are these are very powerful different images right this creates fear and
01:07:18
what it does it takes away on as the so people
01:07:21
living in working with in a diverse environment where you've got these
01:07:25
different nationalities my advice of the movies reduce the power distance
01:07:29
the world is going that way anyway the do it quickly why 'cause people one on us they let
01:07:34
me show you what happens when people abuse of power honestly goes out the window it disappears
01:07:40
and we need honesty today right guys yeah this is the effects of the lack of
01:07:45
it uh_huh uh_huh no artist the means different
01:07:51
things in different compute in different environments
01:07:54
and what you look at when you look at that model by richard lewis
01:07:58
i have a strongly recommend you do it you'll see the honesty is
01:08:03
easy uh improve coaches the easy he looked if you
01:08:07
aren't device drivers work environment if you are blue
01:08:11
it takes a long time for typical yellows to become on this to
01:08:15
become the right to say what they feel it just not
01:08:19
in that zone yet okay and all this the is important because it saves time i've got
01:08:24
a great little film here mm artist is important because it saves time in in today's
01:08:30
world we don't have time we don't have time to waste the time not being honest and
01:08:38
initially little clip is very short so watching it goes it goes over really quickly
01:08:44
this woman has been away from work for a few years she comes back to work
01:08:49
of the ten years away and hasn't relies
01:08:52
there's been a technological revolution yearend ah
01:09:02
look around the room basically the older you are
01:09:07
the more you'll off mm 'cause if you're under thirty you don't even get the joke mm
01:09:16
you look at it i going why is that funny mm
01:09:23
and the possibilities it tomorrow are enormous right they huge
01:09:28
who knows what's coming tomorrow or anything could be coming from our right how
01:09:35
uh_huh do so people often ask me in we have a very diverse
01:09:41
workplace how should we deal with that you know we got
01:09:43
all these different cultures we can't accommodate everybody no you can't you
01:09:48
have to decide what will be the common coach uh
01:09:51
hear what you bridge the gaps and you preach the gaps are the
01:09:55
ones that you bridge the gaps but um the spending each other
01:09:58
not by accepting or agreeing necessarily you just understand it i get it i know where you're coming from
01:10:05
now let's try and me in the middle somewhere and drummer start today with the picture these kids these
01:10:14
uh my kate's you see they grow up this is taking a while back that is what i
01:10:19
look like today they still really belong there amazing on they had had long they are it's incredible
01:10:25
you see these kids here are my living proof that diversity is an advantage let me explain
01:10:31
because i consider it i mean i prefer leech the ah i
01:10:37
can take the best the three cultures and put them in
01:10:40
these gets they all very norwegian there they did being raised in
01:10:44
norway have norwegian possible so they are we each and
01:10:48
but they got quite a bit of british in them as well they've got british they've got the language
01:10:54
they've got this sense of adventure and curiosity
01:10:58
they've got the humour anything go us they've got the
01:11:03
politeness and which on a good day the brits
01:11:07
are really good at the really good really yeah something was there really well still love it yeah
01:11:12
and they've got that self irony and sarcasm as well and it was it got so that's how even then to
01:11:18
you've got the one of the got the extra version they've got the ability to think outside the box
01:11:25
they've got the ability to understand that the word isn't perfect so you do with that
01:11:29
the putting these things in them every day set this model again which i really encourage you go and check at
01:11:36
okay the insides and typical behaviour is in different coaches and hopefully we hope you preach
01:11:41
the gaps but at the end of the it's all about base be curious be
01:11:45
brave respect i just like to finish of the really good film it takes about
01:11:51
a minute and a half i've got a minute half to stay with me
01:11:55
it comes in denmark anywhere from denmark here and the danes great
01:11:58
didn't say thank you straight away to this great movie it's uh it's a movie for t. v. station
01:12:04
the two messages in the t. v. station have a advertisement that first messages watch t. v. two
01:12:10
the second messages in the world we live today where we have a tendency to put each other in boxes
01:12:15
what would the world be like if we started asking
01:12:18
questions instead ask questions be curious be brave
01:12:23
and respect have a look at this little film just it's just as a couple minutes or
01:12:30
right
01:12:34
uh_huh
01:12:36
and there's no
01:12:38
hi
01:12:40
just
01:12:45
trying to avoid
01:12:49
or
01:12:56
now
01:12:58
the religious
01:13:01
oh
01:13:03
some
01:13:06
uh_huh we don't share
01:13:08
right
01:13:10
the comment is probably there
01:13:14
i rather
01:13:17
prior
01:13:20
yeah yeah yeah yeah
01:13:41
wow
01:14:07
oh yeah
01:14:14
oh
01:14:22
oh
01:14:36
we
01:14:40
wow
01:14:44
ah
01:15:03
oh
01:15:12
yeah
01:15:22
alright oh it's a great movie is uh yeah this
01:15:28
is a round of applause absolutely um i think
01:15:33
i think it's an important movie i think the message is really strong look at
01:15:37
the danes they get really really prior to the most is the logo little
01:15:41
and it's just an important message for the world that we live in today at over so my forum
01:15:45
s. issue is basically curious brave respect i've given
01:15:50
you a some tips on the model um
01:15:53
i'm a i'm more than willing to send this to take after some shoulder publish a lot
01:15:57
of this on the website i can make a a condensed version of this presentation
01:16:02
how this is being useful fuelled inspiration of you uh i wish you
01:16:06
well for the rest of the conference thank you very much okay

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