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ICCA Congress 2017 Day 3 - Bridging the Culture Gap: insights and tools on how to communicate effectively across cultures
Pellegrino Riccardi, Founder, Pellegrino Consulting
Tuesday, Nov. 14, 2017 · 1:50 p.m. · 01h 16m 16s
Bridging the Culture Gap: insights and tools on how to communicate effectively across cultures Cross cultural expert, motivational speaker, teacher, communications consultant and even a world-touring rock musician, Pellegrino Riccardi has spent the last 30 years travelling the globe connecting with people. The common thread running through these many roles is making a connection with audiences through their hearts and minds, and also helping the people he communicates with to connect and interact more effectively with each another, which today is the essence of his role on stage as an international keynote speaker. Pellegrino’s style of public speaking is a seamless fusion of masterful storytelling and observational humour in what he calls “edutainment” (education + entertainment). Coupled with a unique combination of powerful visual and multimedia effects, Pellegrino takes his audience on a visceral and emotional journey. “I don’t just want my audiences to understand my message; I want them to feel it too,” says Pellegrino. This session was awarded 1.25 CE credits. CMP-IS Domain J: Professionalism Pellegrino Riccardi, Founder, Pellegrino Consulting
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okay um
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right i think we'll start a um we were uh uh
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my name is a pedigree no recovery were actually waiting for someone to introduce
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me but i don't think that person's coming so all introduce myself
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uh after five minutes we figured that from the person wasn't coming um
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we're gonna spend about an hour with you look in it what is actually quite a complex area
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uh a little before we before we start because i have such little time mm we'd have to general lies a
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little bit here and there and the come along with me i'll give you some cool little tools and takes
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on how to bridge this cultural gap you know just as a piece of paper in
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front of you always watching use some of you already started answering the questions
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that was really good i'm keen to get going i see that uh would be looking at the case
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later on together a little bit about myself as first of all as anyone seen it before him
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couple people see me before good you probably don't remember anything that doesn't matter anyway yes um
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my family is italian and italians in the room and italians you like football
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ah ha uh_huh
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uh_huh
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that's a we understand each other alright good
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my family's italian they come from the city of nepal eight naples inc is not
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put every heard of happily what is not really famous for be honest
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mafia good it's my parents left they left the u. k. in
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nineteen sixty emigrated to the u. k. so i was
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raised in the u. k. which is why i have this lovely british accents and one for the u. k.
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anywhere from the u. k. from the side of the u. k. this southern english
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accent is quite a powerful accents it makes a sound instantly intelligent huh huh
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do you know that yeah it does your after head starts and instantly intelligent
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um i've been i've been living in norway for the past twenty two years any norwegians in the room
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they're they are great and
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up inevitably to you is geographically these countries are very close together very close to get that
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culturally speaking although they have a lot in common there are some major differences between them
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so i've grown up with primarily to coach as two
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languages in our third culture and the third language
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um and it's not always easy actually
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to kind of reconcile those three couches and that's the kind of thing i'm gonna be talking about it
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uh i travel around the world doing workshops courses helping companies bridge this cultural gap
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what i really do is i help people get along better with people from where culture is often a factor
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and when they say you know can you help us do that can you crate good
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working environments we live we live we work in a an environment of diversity
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how should we deal with that and and in sort of make the most of it and take advantage of it
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i say to them you gotta start with the images the images in your head so gonna play
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a little bit with the images in your head i do a lot of travelling over
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a hundred travel days a year on average it's good and it's bad luck from right i've
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been doing that for nearly thirty years so i've seen pretty much the whole world
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i got the perfect name is a strange to i won't bore you with the details is a
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strange men but basically what i was born my father is a picture of my father
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each one look at me and said display will travel very much i will call him politely don't so you kind of prophesied
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so i became pelican you know he regretted that a little bit
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when the source grandchildren look at these three beautiful italian kate's
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mm rights 'cause you looked at that many looked at being said at the alley said that get out all much is it
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and that line there that funny that lying there tells us something
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important about human beings 'cause it's quite obvious but it's important
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my fall the uh for many many years has had an
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image in his head of how is grandchildren will look
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subconsciously right and that image in the image they did not have blond
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hair and blue ox there's nothing wrong with blond hair blue box
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but it's not the picture he had any said can you see that so then
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you get a gap and when you get the gap you get reactions mm
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it's the gaps that makes life interesting exciting challenging frustration
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difficult i wish it wasn't there and wouldn't it be easy if those kind
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of things is the gaps so it's all about dealing with the gaps
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so what i always say is when the images in front of you don't actually images in your head
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that's what it's all about that's what cultural changes about that's what any formal changes about those
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are the gaps we've got a bridge sup let's look at cultural what is culture
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fifteen seconds turns of the person next to you try and say in one sentence
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what culture is one quick person x. the what is culture in one sentence
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mm
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mm
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mm
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uh_huh
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uh_huh
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okay right it's okay um you probably said things like uh you know it's have
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it says customs is values is norms it's all those things there right
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and it's quite difficult to actually explain and soon you you discover it becomes
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really big you know we talk about aunts coloured language fruit it's everything
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i've got quite a nice definition of coach i hope you like it it's really simple
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and i think it kinda sums up what culture is is is what it is is not nice
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is the way we do things around here are the important part of
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that sentence is the word here and so that also applies
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to organisational cultures well group culture you know you got the finance
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department and the sales department a thinking two completely different ways
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they could be the same nationality from the same town working in the same company but
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you say here in our department is not the same as there in your department
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the way we do things around here okay example
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just think of standing in line him you go into a bank do you understand
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how they stand in line here to get it is not a trick question
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can you see that you press the button here and there are numbers you wait appear rights you get it
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everybody's column how about this system of standing in line to get it to pull the piece of
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paper wait for the number these two seem to fall column what about this one how
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uh_huh
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mm right so this is taking a prism looking your reaction well might not let says
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that's it that's the gap that image is not the same as the image in my head
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and this one isn't even difficult to understand is it is not even
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complicated and it's also really tangible you can see and touch it
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this is the easiest level of the ball and yet you get that reaction what
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about the things you can see like other people's values can see those
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they're really trickle to do it so i'm gonna try give it the system today on how to deal with that so it's about the images
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in front of you when they don't match images yet as scandinavians
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raise your hand that's yeah and nordic spiny fins in
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the room anyone for finland anything's one feign great loving it on your own or just anyway that it is
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we got to the nordic countries standing in line is that very interesting concept i live in norway
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that's the image of a perfect q. in norway what's important here is the is the distance
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but this is right guys and these are things you don't think about you just
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know instinctively that distance is really important that distance is even more important
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that's a crucial the students so what i like to do often in norway guys i like
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to stand behind allegiance and i like to test the this rule by doing that
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we're talking centimetres but that is enough to make that person feel
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uncomfortable and and the game is how far can i go
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before i get the action yeah uh_huh yes
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mm anyone from india from anywhere from india here at the back there you go so
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was it in the last year that killing system the images completely different look at this this is a very
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i don't know what's going on here mm
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right uh_huh ha
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huh alright
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maybe
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ah yes
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or finland mm or finland finland effect and if you like
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space phyllis applies to go without it at home
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this is the can't really gave us knock at we remember nokia connecting people i think that's really ironic how
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really ironic uh i was uh in uh i was having a mail in helsinki not long ago
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trying to connect with the person next to me and it was clear we had two completely different images
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on how we talk conversations because italians we just
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we we have a tendency just to talk
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say something silence is silence is deaf
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just talks anything just say the fame
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appeared to me to be like the kind of person that thinks if i don't have
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anything valuable to say don't say a white pollute the where the world with her
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so i thought right let me try on asking a simple question maybe i'll
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get a reaction i'll listen to his reaction and follow up the words
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in his sentences really simple yeah i said have you lived in helsinki or
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life he replied by saying not yet ha ha isn't really stray
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and we get these things all the time these these different images and i like to test people images of me
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i like to say this to people this is my favourite phrase which
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i try to sneak in what i talk to strangers usually airports
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when i say this with by southern british accent it usually works quite well you can trust me
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i could hear the scope of authority and aplomb as we call it in english as a nice word
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you can transmit i was at the airport once in the lounge guy said i just need to go to the toilet could you watch with back show
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you contrast means that nobody some forgotten because norwegians i i sometimes i pretend
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i'm norwegian works quite well the norwegian accent to you controls me
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well from all right yeah if yeah
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is the last one the gets the reactions are
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would you like to hear it you don't need to hear it 'cause the images dark in your head
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listen to it can hear it can hear your reaction as well you could ask the ah
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decide i'm from italy you contrast with a problem mm how uh_huh
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mm isn't really crazy i'm the same person saying the same words in three
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different ways three different actions any germans anyone from germany or germany
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be honest if i said it with a german accent or italian accent which would you
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trust the most uh germans german yeah okay are you sure about that ah yes
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uh_huh be careful don't fall into the traps right at the end and germans italians all of
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that we've you know the germans get really annoyed with this combo on that's not fair
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this is six chairman engineer is doing something bad in spoiling it for
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many many many other people writes its own fat message or
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is good then you know what it's like to be an italian or not to trust it is the same feeling yeah
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because i know why um i've got to use you see yourself myself images another
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part of the code to use you would like to be seen you've
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got it to we spend a lot of time and energy in a circle
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and the law circle is called the user there's actually see them
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when i say you can trust me those three circles stick
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together quite closely there's a close correlation between the three
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myself image one trying to be you know you see me kind of match each other can you see that
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what is it you contrast me and you'll off this happens
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and that is the this is the process of misunderstanding cross cultural misunderstanding it's
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being miss perceive misunderstood and funny joke aside it's a little bit painful
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you contrast the uh_huh good we're not laughing as much in uh
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and and pain comes in different forms it could be confusion frustration could be anger
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if you've ever been at home with your loved one had an argument and your loved one
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says something to you which is really unfair and you click you know you you just
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is that ever happened to that's not feeling of that loss or cool being ripped away
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so bridging the gap in culture is really about moving that circle back into
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the middle how do you do that well it's about understanding the images
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i'm providing images for the other person you know they will like that they will see as familiar
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it's a process of adaptation
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okay we'll have a look at this as well arrived in norway ninety five cut the i wanna talk about that this whole idea
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of adapting yourself changing being willing to change is a really important
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part of bridging coated apps before i went to norway
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i've always stood on the stage of so the stage for for a very long time but i didn't
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always have a suit and i wasn't always ate consultant i used to play in a band
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yeah i played in a band quite good band the band was we were invited to to warm up for
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really good band in nineteen ninety three a band called you to you might have heard of them yeah
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i took this photograph grave wrote a note of the eighty thousand other
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to see ass but i don't care it's a great voter
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shortly after this i play the concert in norway okay i'm just giving a quick idea
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of the life i had there and that a norwegian a very sweet norwegian
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who uh move with me to england was there for two years of the two years she
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said i'd i'd like to go back to norway can you come with the we
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were on holiday that's i'm we having a holiday in the sight of italy and she
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was telling me come to norway it's a lovely place you should really given
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mm i will make you happy and all that stuff from which to change the potential change
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a life i had to be on the wooden bats in the movies gap plus
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was sitting on a beach in norway signal to be genetically here and i was thinking
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to myself what would it be each in all we look like right now
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i'd like you all to imagine a beach unknowing and not allegiance 'cause they know what it looks like
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the only image that came up in my head was this one here right huh
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mm mm
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it shouldn't but it does 'cause we were sitting on a different place on
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this beautiful beach in the southern coast of italy or is it
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is this italy
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this is normally uh_huh and it's just a a kind of a simple way with the message to challenge those
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images again people have this so called culturally televisions they
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are constantly challenging their own images in it
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and that's what i have to do with you let's start with a quick challenge of you know less the little exercise put yourself in this situation
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you're the passenger in a car which is being driven by your best friend your best friend is driving the car and
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everybody imagine that best friend say best friends naming i hate
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to use f. k. u. friend hits a pedestrian
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it's an accident as no alcohol involved no drugs look it's it's an accident
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you know your friends driving it fifty in the thirties um there's
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no doubt in your head about that okay no question
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there are no witnesses saying
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and your friends list as if you were to testify no think all the frames driving
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of thirty might save your best friend from serious consequences everybody understand the situation
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he comes the question what are likely to didn't know turns of
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the person next you don't say anything don't say anything at
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turn to the person next to you don't tell them if you would lie that's easy
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try to guess if the person next to you will you will what's in this situation
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and see if you're right see if you guess right just spend a half a minute doing that mm mm
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uh_huh
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yeah
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uh_huh
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okay
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oh okay right
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um by all means talk about this case soft words to tell you know it tell each other why you would do you think was
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it easy to guess what the person next to you said obviously
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if you know that person well your guess pretty clearly but
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what would be interesting to do we don't have time to look at the dynamics people who don't know each other when you're facing
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across someone to what extent are you being influenced by those images that you've heard before
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how relevant all day okay this is actually being done is quite a well known survey
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right um by the way do you think i would lie for my best friend
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you contrast the right the uh_huh terrible that so difficult um i'll
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be honest with you i would not lie for my front
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no i would not a surprise you had you asked me twenty two years ago before with no way i would have said yes
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twenty two years and always has done something to me it's also
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a each with age comes responsibility and all that stuff
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but i have absolutely been influenced by my norwegian surroundings a society of high
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levels of trust basically to keep it simple thank you norwegians right yeah
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and uh and this is what i think you know being exposed to environments it's almost impossible not to
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be influenced by the environment because we are creatures of adaptation as well at that into my environment
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but it's been done let me show you here uh i hope you can see the countries 'cause
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the quite small but percentage of respondents you said they would probably not lie in court
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actually i wonder could we have the peaks big picture of just the results in
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that you don't need to see me a great thank you that's ever look
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we've got finland sweden norway germany u. k. poland
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france italy india brazil china russia venezuela nigeria
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not all your countries out there but you know instinctively where your country is right
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and you know definitely what your country is primarily blue all primarily read it
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it doesn't mean they hear you as an individual are primarily blue or red that's another story
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okay but raise your hand if you come from a primarily blue country
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take a look around primarily read country primarily right
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you guys are great you guys it definitely right you're definitely right okay so you're talking to each other why uh whether right or
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your red ha okay good i can i is it true to say
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that people from nigeria all less on list then people from sweden
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the answer is no it's tempting to look at that i go well look at the facts and figures
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that's that's that's the job for the media the media does that right course not i've
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done this in nigeria anyone from nigeria probably anyone from there we go great
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i've done this many times in nigeria actually and it's true i mean most nigerians say
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yes i would too but not one single nigerian thinks it's good to
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lighten lying is a universal bad from all over the world
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but if you ask nigerians why they are more likely
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then you get the real lots of this these results why it's because blue coaches have high interest in
00:23:01
the system would it be guess wealth or to use the system the rules the justices them
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uh it doesn't mean is perfect but we believe it can be perfect and basically the more you go this way
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the less you believe in uh in red couches people are not treated
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the same it's not equal treatment everybody doesn't work like that
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and i'm gonna talk a little bit about the consequences so if we can get both screens back up
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to us the question why when you asked that question why enough times you'll come to this
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that behind the behaviour there's usually strength as well as we there's all there's a positive intention was like all it often
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so nigerian just say yes i would lie they don't even use the word lie they say no i yeah i would protect my friend
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and i think this is the first step to bridging cultural gaps is actually looking at the
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different in each which you may not even like or agree with and say okay
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let's put aside what i believe about it and try to take
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for what the positive intentional the string fees behind it
00:24:02
what is it that doing doesn't make it writes your job is to understand to bridge the gap
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i've got this i've got this formula in life which have to be a long time to come up with this formulate so simple
00:24:16
but basically people we've coated intelligence if we use that term they
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have some that the first of all they curious people
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a curious they open up and i think let's explore why let me find out
00:24:32
they're also brave let me explain what i mean by brave separate because they're willing to go into someone else's world
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i see what it's like it's also brave because what often happens is when you understand that the people
00:24:44
get inside the world sometimes you find out that way you did it wasn't actually that good
00:24:50
the perhaps they did it a better way it's brave as well it's much safer to sit
00:24:55
in your box and think this is the way we've done its work forever it's great
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get inside the other person and when you have those two together you are
00:25:02
that with this respect which i haven't spell incorrectly respect i'm i'm
00:25:07
the language person so like words i love the etymology of words and
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we look at the word respect it means to look again
00:25:16
can you see that return rewiring repeat spectator spectacle respect means what
00:25:21
you just it just now the way you do things
00:25:24
is not the way i would do if i don't like the way you do it if i'm really honest
00:25:30
but before a judge you i'm willing at least to look at you again from a new angle and see if
00:25:34
i can understand that these what you're trying to achieve let me try to understand why you did that
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'cause if i get y. u. d. d. i. can attack it from a different angle and
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the only way to do that is to come into contact them be curious about you
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respect does not mean agree it does not mean except some respect is respect
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look again and you're looking for these positive intentions as a lot of talk about global mindset
00:25:59
what is global mindsets and what is its flexibility of the moment
00:26:05
it's tolerance for ambiguity i don't know they're all they're all a black and white aunts is
00:26:13
okay it's the up is the ability to adapt to a given example any sweets in the room
00:26:20
is is even more relevant today right but those are all interested in
00:26:24
football uh sweden not that it's really in the qualifying yesterday evening
00:26:30
so's we that are going to the world cup in russia and
00:26:34
italy or not for the first five to sixty years
00:26:37
big national tragedy okay even if you're not interested in football you
00:26:40
can understand that's quite a blow to us congratulations weights
00:26:46
mm one thing italians there we win graciously and we lose graciously that's how it
00:26:51
is what was it like if we do this a lot in italy
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okay swayed speed you know that you were known as the germans or the north from
00:27:02
uh_huh it's not my phrase it's a common phrase in my business the germans
00:27:06
a lot that you know this sweets to you like that term
00:27:11
and not really having no offence to the germans
00:27:17
they don't like that i've never met a single swede who like that term next question why are you refer
00:27:22
to as the germans and off i wonder why that is any any can you enlighten us sweets
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they like order they like discipline their risk
00:27:33
averse that detail oriented that very
00:27:38
very careful uh_huh you saw that yes they even did you see that
00:27:43
he possible it was like the yellow will the berlin you just couldn't get past it
00:27:49
and i say brilliant i'm so glad sweets uh like that because without those
00:27:53
qualities this company would never worked as well as it does right
00:27:58
that's what it's about it's about flipping the negative side step positives
00:28:02
what is it that they bring to us those real working in a diverse workplace
00:28:07
it's all about managing the strength of people what is it they do what can they bring
00:28:12
to the mix that was missing before what this is what managing diversity is about
00:28:17
it's focusing on strengths it's not ignoring the weaknesses
00:28:21
but is focusing on strengths so let's talk about some of the strings first of all blue coaches
00:28:25
trust insistence i know i'm generalising read couches the trusting people why because this isn't still work
00:28:34
i was on hold in the side of italy around the naples area just being read from the very special
00:28:40
part of italy it does not speak for the whole of it sleep is a very special region okay
00:28:45
trying to park a car in norway already blue culture if you
00:28:49
wanna paw caught their systems therapy signs they're all white
00:28:52
lines on the road their apps there'll machines you don't need to talk to a single person to park your car
00:28:58
everything works that that that that that barrier goes up when you put it to get in is fantastic
00:29:05
doesn't quite work like that yeah and you get things done
00:29:09
three people you get somebody who could influence you'll world
00:29:13
and you strike up a relationship with them as quickly as possible and you try to get them to like you
00:29:22
i was there on holiday with my wife and three kids could find anywhere to park i see this lovely woman here
00:29:27
to see what job she has just the ticket attended parking i woke up to her i happen to speak
00:29:33
this dialect from the naples area just not quite italian
00:29:38
i speak the strange dialect alone i got home start speaking this language uh
00:29:42
say is that a parking place to deceive not so my question
00:29:46
she says uh what did you learn to speak and up and down is very nice
00:29:50
i learned from my father my mother really what are they from every start talking
00:29:55
i come from village to village elder at the mountaineers a couple you really should come from the same village is my parents
00:30:01
really what you'll you'll pay eases your key it's your wife you want even my wife's in the car thinking what the hell is he doing yeah
00:30:09
he said he was gonna eyes for a parking space just pointing at a watch
00:30:16
you know i 'cause she's no time is money no no not in right coaches time is
00:30:24
an opportunity to build bombs which is the best guaranteeing contract in life you and me
00:30:30
you see in red coaches if people live uh oh you feel
00:30:34
you own like you know help you preferably all three
00:30:39
she doesn't only off a an a but i can get her to like me that's what we
00:30:44
couldn't some of the five minutes of cheeky chatty she likes me i can feel it
00:30:51
she says what is your question i said is that a parking place jesus
00:30:56
shouldered but don't park your car bad why not is too expensive
00:31:02
she's thinks he's telling me it's too expensive really was or the back
00:31:06
you got all the data where and she points to assign
00:31:10
uh_huh sure right
00:31:14
i stopped smiling about didn't know waylon every come on
00:31:18
just as is your money or the what you like you spend forty order but if you park your car
00:31:22
that i will give you a parking fine for the auto you wanna say that's ah ha ha there
00:31:31
hum hum
00:31:35
uh_huh great uh where you from italy sir
00:31:40
where from where from the north is just as shocked as you
00:31:44
guys there is the mm it's very different yeah wow
00:31:51
very different about my current also local about parking regions that
00:31:58
they know why because you we'll is on the line
00:32:01
well i've taught me in all it's very simple the role is very simple you cannot have
00:32:05
any of the black rubber tire on the line it must be inside the box
00:32:09
the back of the car can hang over the line that's okay but the the law i you know this is the all blue coaches know the rules
00:32:17
i didn't move the car it'll come on what difference does that make it did i get a fine yeah there it is
00:32:28
but i used to feel sorry for may no not really uh_huh
00:32:33
uh_huh wow it's so different isn't it ah it's so different
00:32:40
blues watch the clock rates watch the relationship and this is important as well there's
00:32:49
a there's a there's a kind of an internal in patients in blue cultures
00:32:54
we wanna get things done we wanna get things done we wanna get things done
00:32:58
we uh budgets in quarterly results and get things done correct
00:33:03
red's notice of may use it to their advantage and they just delay things
00:33:09
just been a okay stressed out and then no got their start putting their prices than
00:33:14
yeah that's how it works that's how it works uh_huh uh_huh uh_huh back to
00:33:23
this story and i tried to talk my way out of a fine
00:33:29
that's the red reaction toll let's talk about you and me we talk i
00:33:33
to or i i will find your soul talk to your soul
00:33:38
we will work decide together that's what rights do not just the
00:33:41
times rates all over the world it's relationship oriented it's talking
00:33:46
i recommend you watch a fantastic movie an iranian movie called
00:33:50
separation it's about divorce where that the man them father
00:33:56
and the mother spend the whole movie talking to a judge
00:34:00
to influence the charge toward custody of the child
00:34:04
it's a fascinating movie or just it's a great movie anyway but the way they use
00:34:08
it through speaking it's not black and whites so said right i'm gonna call in
00:34:15
to the office and told why why identifying him my wise reaction was of
00:34:20
course oh i called in i said id decomposition in english not norwegian
00:34:28
even those big originated in english white because you can trust me british
00:34:33
i receive the fine yes i can hear him only commuted
00:34:37
is it because your wee little malone it must be inside the box i said
00:34:42
oh no my wife is feeling sick i'm sorry about that i stop
00:34:44
the car had together inside the cafe i wasn't thinking on never do it
00:34:48
again i understand it's recorded but you will most beings like the box
00:34:53
the rules must be the save everybody mm i never she was sick
00:34:57
and pregnant and all this is true sick pregnant or stressed
00:35:01
i'm sorry on everything together i've learned my lesson or one of them is recorded i really do both you real most people
00:35:08
listen i she's sick pregnant we just built a house cash flows really low listen if this is how
00:35:14
sure are never do it again if i do it again i keep my name on your system
00:35:18
if i do it again send me ten fines that's our show or ion i'll never do it again
00:35:25
uh that is very creative solutions or whatever i have not heard that one before
00:35:31
bought the wheel motions of uh guys are moving yeah i can't
00:35:35
get to is all this this kind of screen of cool
00:35:40
systematic for soft and which is how blues often perceived by rates
00:35:46
because would this lot is no one is that he it's
00:35:51
and the guy says that they missed the recording or your italian uh
00:35:56
i am a bit italian why do you like football for paul
00:36:01
finally i'm through can you see that i'm talking to the person the reds want to reach the person inside who
00:36:08
is the person inside not your position i know you position
00:36:12
the person i trust i've broken through selloff opal
00:36:18
you look he says to me you like football well mister record it's just like football inaudible must be over the line
00:36:25
how we're mostly insight about
00:36:28
uh_huh
00:36:31
that's blue mm
00:36:34
crazy huh it's crazy
00:36:37
and then when you actually communicate how do we communicate swedish fumble manager uh_huh
00:36:42
as a very different way of communicating is feelings to i and italian or regular just think blue and red
00:36:49
uh is taken from a norwegian t. v. program so there are subtitles you don't need to understand the subject
00:36:54
was you're basically saying manages join a game how they react to goals being scored goals being missed
00:37:00
uh agreeing with the referee disagreeing with the referee you'll get the idea okay
00:37:05
oh look at this coming up now i'm half
00:38:08
i i
00:38:12
i i right
00:38:17
they're very different
00:38:20
or
00:38:22
i don't i am not saying that one is better than the other of course i i'm glad this will be it's only
00:38:27
because quite frankly it's sleepy rubbish recently right they deserve is
00:38:31
good but what it was just says is that column
00:38:35
gets results to do it is that i'm not saying that this is
00:38:39
the magic formula and and i bridged the gap living in scandinavia
00:38:44
by turning down my redness turning it that because it works better calm
00:38:53
works best in always take or um
00:38:58
especially in conflict stick on talk about to cool on mistakenly really long fine yeah
00:39:05
'cause culture is not an on off switch unless you've grown in a a
00:39:09
family with two coaches you you cannot switch it on and off
00:39:13
it takes time to adapt yeah it just doesn't feel you uh and
00:39:20
our them but when we got married in this i think of the normal way of us uh it was just a
00:39:26
quite calm ceremony there was seventy guess they're sixty five norwegians five italian so it's quite common
00:39:33
another receptions the norwegians telling each other how wonderful these and and this is what my fall the hurt
00:39:39
this is what he heard it does mean it was like this but this is what my fault uh
00:39:44
listen to the sixty five norwegians this is what my father he heard
00:39:49
he was speed difference here he's task prior to sell just beautiful the priest was
00:39:55
fantastic was like his p. e. heard you heard sixty five people whispering
00:40:02
return to babysit but idealistic this is a wedding or a funeral is high
00:40:09
that's a typical misinterpretation between
00:40:13
because the pictures all different in your head so i'm gonna test these images of oslo but you will see little
00:40:20
case in front to i just wanna give you five minutes trying to huddle close together at push chairs together
00:40:27
have a look at this case somebody already started reading it
00:40:30
see if what i've said so far provides any insights
00:40:34
into somebody else's here okay five minutes then five just five six minutes to have a look at that
00:40:43
uh_huh
00:40:50
uh_huh
00:40:53
uh_huh
00:40:56
mm uh_huh uh_huh
00:47:50
oh okay
00:47:54
let me um
00:47:57
let me jump in there are i realise that you haven't finished artist i it's just
00:48:02
i wanted to give a little taste of a typical the interaction i should mention that this
00:48:07
is a really oh this is a real story simplified to make a case obviously
00:48:12
this is a real interaction and as you can see it's an interaction with is
00:48:16
just it's a misunderstanding of images on there just to save a little
00:48:23
bit of to go around the room with a microphone to get all your comments on that but for in the in the interest of of time
00:48:30
if i just go through and and put forth some of the most common replies of how
00:48:34
to this case around the world and you can see yourselves with you agree right
00:48:38
how appropriate was it for the that's also for job restored to there's nothing wrong
00:48:42
with asking everybody does the whole world the blues to german this veins norwegians
00:48:49
brits this is how we get jobs and we asked people for them and
00:48:53
we give jobs the people we know through that works sometimes recording headhunters
00:48:58
you find them for us but it's basically we it's no it's all about how you ask
00:49:03
and the point about as a blue would ask in a way that
00:49:06
you don't feel as if you have to you can say no
00:49:10
rates without releasing the last the favour some people they know and this is himself
00:49:15
you can't say no and they don't realise that and you can't say no
00:49:22
and if you look at right coach is one of the biggest problems a
00:49:24
basis in red is it's much more difficult to say no to people
00:49:29
especially relationships or people above you in the hierarchy you have power over your life
00:49:36
uh_huh blues don't have to do that so much survey that
00:49:41
asked for question in a way that feels a little
00:49:44
bit pressure the icons i know why this way up levy has a right to us phones for this favour
00:49:51
well the that blues the because is known for ten years these these are relationship come on that's what we do
00:49:58
i've been a little work if you've a tiny is in fact on the batteries to have to come and ask you for this favour
00:50:04
you should have seen it by now yeah and asked me but i have a duty to my daughter my family to help
00:50:12
or now i'm taking you for a job i'm talking from the head of it out that doesn't make it right
00:50:19
when side view that's had that anyone did anyone see that it never did
00:50:23
anyone see this year he's in terrorist to have to go and ask
00:50:28
you should know what do you think that has good reason to be of added what do you think it does a lot it doesn't matter
00:50:36
it's the emotion you have to do with and is emotion is i am offended
00:50:41
and you cannot ally a good feelings don't lie you can't say to someone no you're not offended
00:50:48
yes i am i'm tired no you're not from it's the motion you have to deal with it will be
00:50:56
impressed got together at all but yet he does he feels he has a right to be offended
00:51:02
one of the that's positive intentions there at least three he wants to help
00:51:07
restore to he was to help himself he wants to help the
00:51:09
company you want to save the company money because it's cost a lot of money to recruit people you don't have to do that
00:51:16
and you could go on there are many more positive intentions white doesn't his boss see the positive intentions
00:51:22
the simple answer is is not looking for them is boss is not a bad person at all
00:51:29
his boss is kind of stalking his little blue picture and sees the
00:51:33
world through these blue spectacles which in the situation is not
00:51:38
helpful it's very helpful in other situations but not this one here v.
00:51:44
that is not innocent he's been there long enough to know this
00:51:49
so if you feel that i'm got on the outside i'm not of it outside that both to blame
00:51:54
it's an interaction between two people and that's one of the most important things in diversity environments you know
00:52:01
it's the responsibility of everyone to be aware not just the
00:52:06
minority the minority as well needs to be aware
00:52:09
how can i bridge the gap do thing fronts could've handled the situation better yes
00:52:15
he is a is a possible lots of the past also i ever heard from my group so
00:52:19
my workshops came from a guy uh it was seen it happen actually in singapore uh_huh
00:52:28
and they also when something like this and he said this person said to be five being the possible said thank you for the c. v.
00:52:35
it's very nice of you to bring it to me first i appreciate that sorry i
00:52:39
haven't been to you i know you told is looking for a job listen
00:52:43
if this one my company i give or job like that it's not unfortunately
00:52:50
we have very strict strict rules regulations so i can't just give or job
00:52:54
his what i suggest you do i suggest should give the c. v.
00:52:57
due to alternate oscar to apply yourself i can let the h. r.
00:53:00
department know that it's coming nothing wrong with that can't guarantee job
00:53:06
the two that in fact i if i helped you to help your door to get a job it would look
00:53:13
bad on your toll to if anybody found that it would backfire on or so we don't want that's all
00:53:19
so the best thing for her in this environment is to get her to apply room
00:53:24
if that doesn't work combat somebody will go to plan b. hope she gets a job that's it and i and i
00:53:32
thought was a great aunts that because each talks a perfect balance between a red and blue you're not telling lies
00:53:38
you're not losing your integrity you still yourself but you adapt
00:53:42
to new communication style to suit the target audience
00:53:47
there are lots of grace systems out there to help you do this i suggest you google some these they're very easy to find
00:53:53
um his one that i'd it to preparing for beating this one cousin erin maya
00:53:58
aaron myers writing a lot at the moment uh especially for the harvard business review
00:54:02
she's written about connecticut culture lap which i suggest you read very useful collide
00:54:09
if you set up that this quadrant here if we put this look emotionally an expressive and
00:54:13
emotionally expressive have one line there and on the other line we put confrontational which means
00:54:19
not afraid to disagree it doesn't mean you punch people right yeah it means you're not afraid to go in
00:54:25
and disagree and avoid confrontation this one because i'm quite interesting
00:54:31
uh and this is based on their minds research over here you've got countries like italy spain russia france
00:54:37
could use can everybody see the countries by the way what we need to experiments should reach of the big picture yeah baby yes
00:54:44
we asked the guys that could be a big picture yeah big picture there we go great so we can see liza then we'll countries
00:54:55
like the netherlands germany this is quite interesting not afraid to disagree with
00:54:59
you and tell you very directly but in a calm way
00:55:04
that makes sense was the guys at the top of the talking general are genuine generalising here was a
00:55:10
the pattern of behaviour there is disagree and do it very you know very hallway
00:55:14
and here we have countries like brazil india mexico saudi arabia the philippines
00:55:21
lots of the motions of expressive thus the avoiding that
00:55:25
confrontation and then here in this corner here right
00:55:30
emotionally on expressive it's all about control and it's all about avoiding confrontation in public very useful
00:55:36
quadrants this stuff is easy to find it very useful before you go into meetings
00:55:41
if these two guys it had this cauldron say or like uh put the blue red you can see the obvious parts of their imagine if they'd be in
00:55:48
look at these to write this is what's happening here from because the indian in addition
00:55:55
to this the the guy from india here if he fits into this parking
00:55:59
is is perception of the german is that he's this interest it does a lot of
00:56:04
talk ability doesn't care which is not the chief perception of a germ of union
00:56:12
is he's why's it gets so hot and and obviously irritated but doesn't say what's
00:56:18
really on his mind and these uh two different pictures and it causes confusion
00:56:27
and all you need is a little system like this to help you
00:56:29
navigate these signals right this is what helps bridge the gap
00:56:33
there's another really useful model like that i don't have some of you see ms it's created by a guy called richard lewis
00:56:40
a u. k. company reaches communications based on colours you'll notice there's another colour that it's blue red and yellow
00:56:47
very useful model going to go this call i i use a small
00:56:51
the lot it's very simplistic it does not cover all the bases
00:56:56
but it's very useful and you'll get things that they are not gonna go
00:56:59
through the table you can find this really easily richard the louis culture
00:57:05
and these are typical patterns of behaviour in communication styles
00:57:09
with each colour okay the rigidly was active modern
00:57:15
uh i i've do testing with people profile testing this is a very large group or looked at
00:57:20
they're all engineers they're all from all over the world there about four hundred people did this test
00:57:25
so a lot of people end up on the same place wanna make it very clear that
00:57:30
these three guys on norwegian one of them is typically norwegian the other two aren't
00:57:37
just as these two guys here are both brazilian one of them is kind of typically brazilian the other
00:57:42
one is not i'm very aware of this but i so the bottle describes patterns of behaviour
00:57:48
now what we're looking at the yellows what is a reactive coach
00:57:53
of basically we've already seen it it's about diplomacy over
00:57:56
truth because of the lead the the lack of wanting to
00:58:00
go into open confrontation you get a lot of diplomacy
00:58:04
if you know what you have to read between the lines the typical one here
00:58:10
this is this explains the behaviour saying yes when perhaps you mean no
00:58:16
oh in no way i had a visitor from a business uh a client
00:58:20
visit from japan and i can see cross country and then he'll
00:58:24
so i thought you know maybe the car i would like to try some skiing would you like to try some skiing
00:58:33
here and he said love that okay it off one it was clear
00:58:36
within the minute the guy i haven't really tried skiing before
00:58:40
i said have you skied before any said yes but not exactly uh_huh
00:58:48
no no sir is fantastic yeah mm that's no somebody
00:58:56
gave is never confront must not lose face
00:58:59
this is an interesting one statements all promises these these characteristics are all in that table or should you
00:59:06
other people say to be heard when oh when my my chinese counterpart
00:59:11
means yes when they say yes amino when you say yes
00:59:15
uh and i've lost so many people from china how they did how do you know when yeses
00:59:19
yes yes is no and they say things like you can see it in the ali's
00:59:25
neck and neck and yeah you can hear it in the voice
00:59:30
they have these codes that are almost impossible to learn right
00:59:35
the best way to know whether yeses yes or no is no is to get them
00:59:39
to make a statement so forget yes no questions they don't work at all don't
00:59:45
say can you deliver this by friday a yes
00:59:51
uh_huh what does that mean instead say
00:59:56
when can you deliver this uh_huh uh how and then if you get if
01:00:02
they can us that's a little that's my advice to people to get you try to
01:00:07
get them to commit to statements whether written written is the best that as a
01:00:11
challenge trying get it in writing you get them to make statements you you turn
01:00:17
around a whole way of thinking blues have a tendency to to think efficiency
01:00:21
can you do it yes yes means yes no means no maybe means maybe the bottle patients it's all
01:00:29
about patients he's a really good one look must
01:00:32
not lose face mm nancy adler canadian researcher
01:00:38
costs people put the for statement to people manager should have precise ounces
01:00:43
to most of the questions people ask them about their work do you agree
01:00:47
i think about that in your working environments how important is it
01:00:52
for a manager to know things to have control of um
01:00:59
when they don't have control or don't know the also
01:01:02
how easy or difficult is it to you'll admit to others you don't know think about the new work environment
01:01:11
what came out from her or an unstable as research was
01:01:14
this is quite clear look in norway sweden netherlands
01:01:21
what that means is when i manage it doesn't know that manages simply says i do not know
01:01:26
but i can find a full year i get back to you and nobody thinks any less of you
01:01:33
as you go progressively this way that becomes much more difficult to admit you don't know
01:01:37
you don't have control you haven't got ever really tight control on the budgets
01:01:44
i used to work with a company that did safety standards ship building ship yards it
01:01:49
was so difficult to get koreans who also for the the southern koreans shipyards
01:01:54
when they made mistakes on the building shapes they didn't let you know and even though you said
01:01:59
listen just let us know now because if we fix it now it costs a hundred dollars
01:02:03
but if we fix it in three months time that's gonna cost a million dollars it's
01:02:08
okay it was unbelievable how difficult it was to say listen we made a mistake
01:02:14
and so they began a whole cultural change how do we change people's images
01:02:18
and the basic images when i make a mistake it's okay i do any could put
01:02:26
the colours of the model in there just to fit the main okay to
01:02:29
give you an idea of what's going on here can anyone see a pattern here
01:02:34
was the pattern can you see the patently apart from the blue and red
01:02:38
is there anything yeah what makes it difficult to admit mistakes can anyone see about in the countries it's
01:02:46
to do with hierarchical hierarchy is a killer of truth hierarchy is the colour of the truth
01:02:54
the nordic countries and all of european it's all about small what because small
01:02:58
partisans reducing the hierarchy the lower the hierarchy the less the fear
01:03:03
what happens of course is you go to red and yellow coaches is that power distance 'cause
01:03:07
i'd like to give a pretty an example from the country that i live in uh
01:03:11
in all of this was completely new to me guys before i came to
01:03:14
know i didn't know this exist it's like a from an italian
01:03:19
patriarchal family the where the father and the mother never online
01:03:26
and it's interesting and i even if you don't
01:03:28
like football yesterday was it was just a cultural case
01:03:32
study you've got it's highly and manager to just
01:03:36
it refuses to admit these no good and he still thinks is gonna carry
01:03:44
on his contract even no no the whole world them most italians
01:03:48
nobody's rubbish right he still clinging onto it because it's that picture of
01:03:55
admitting failure is so difficult to do this is a great pitch
01:04:02
are they to explain to your to show you what for um a small power this is looks like this page was taken in nineteen
01:04:08
seventy three in oslo i need to explain the normal regions of the
01:04:11
other guys watch their faces what i tell the story watch
01:04:15
this is nineteen seventy three there was an old embargo will prices nobody could get fuel
01:04:20
we have power cuts all over the world i remember as a kid that the t. v. would just go off at night we were looking
01:04:27
for candles to light has is so this is all slow all of
01:04:32
no way norwegians a toll on this day to save a few
01:04:36
t. they could do that but i'm not driving that car don't drive the car take the bus or
01:04:41
the train or walk so what these people are on the train in oslo including this guy here
01:04:48
and this person here on the train buying it take it is the key the kenya
01:04:53
of norway to cool story at the the king of norway ask yourself a question
01:05:01
clicking or president or prime minister or porn person you'll country do
01:05:04
that uh_huh and if they did it would you believe it
01:05:09
uh_huh distribution still going on today this is one of the
01:05:14
what they call the nordic model of society it's about
01:05:17
reducing this hierarchies as much as you can if it the you've wanted and thought that
01:05:22
nordic seem to be a bit sort of laid back in quite relaxed about
01:05:26
life it is not just because they are good social welfare assistance is because they
01:05:31
have work environments where they've reduced the fear as much as they can
01:05:34
there's still some left but is pretty good is then traditions caring of today this is the norwegian prime minister today
01:05:43
going shopping in oslo the bodyguard is standing just outside the camera shot i know
01:05:49
but the fact that she's going along with this at the shopping basket no surveys just on around it's
01:05:55
fantastic this picture was taken for just before she became prime minister this is a purse um hum
01:06:03
right
01:06:05
this is the person i can talk to them mm this is what time
01:06:11
magazine writes about what it talks about the nordic model this is it
01:06:16
this is a person i could talk to because they let you and they all rights same person was in
01:06:24
new york two months ago united nations after a hard day work she needs to relax a bit
01:06:30
look at this image guys and ask yourself what the image ever be published in my country other prime minister
01:06:36
this person's allowing an image of her in every day life looking will this
01:06:43
is this is the image that we used to write i put
01:06:48
a bomb on these japanese emperor i keep them look at the barrel
01:06:51
very important that they had must be below the emperor's head right
01:06:55
back home in the united states upon because so much criticism for this
01:07:00
why is he bowing down to the japanese it per euro distaste
01:07:05
isn't bad and everybody this whole idea of equality and
01:07:11
these are these are very powerful different images right this creates fear and
01:07:18
what it does it takes away on as the so people
01:07:21
living in working with in a diverse environment where you've got these
01:07:25
different nationalities my advice of the movies reduce the power distance
01:07:29
the world is going that way anyway the do it quickly why 'cause people one on us they let
01:07:34
me show you what happens when people abuse of power honestly goes out the window it disappears
01:07:40
and we need honesty today right guys yeah this is the effects of the lack of
01:07:45
it uh_huh uh_huh no artist the means different
01:07:51
things in different compute in different environments
01:07:54
and what you look at when you look at that model by richard lewis
01:07:58
i have a strongly recommend you do it you'll see the honesty is
01:08:03
easy uh improve coaches the easy he looked if you
01:08:07
aren't device drivers work environment if you are blue
01:08:11
it takes a long time for typical yellows to become on this to
01:08:15
become the right to say what they feel it just not
01:08:19
in that zone yet okay and all this the is important because it saves time i've got
01:08:24
a great little film here mm artist is important because it saves time in in today's
01:08:30
world we don't have time we don't have time to waste the time not being honest and
01:08:38
initially little clip is very short so watching it goes it goes over really quickly
01:08:44
this woman has been away from work for a few years she comes back to work
01:08:49
of the ten years away and hasn't relies
01:08:52
there's been a technological revolution yearend ah
01:09:02
look around the room basically the older you are
01:09:07
the more you'll off mm 'cause if you're under thirty you don't even get the joke mm
01:09:16
you look at it i going why is that funny mm
01:09:23
and the possibilities it tomorrow are enormous right they huge
01:09:28
who knows what's coming tomorrow or anything could be coming from our right how
01:09:35
uh_huh do so people often ask me in we have a very diverse
01:09:41
workplace how should we deal with that you know we got
01:09:43
all these different cultures we can't accommodate everybody no you can't you
01:09:48
have to decide what will be the common coach uh
01:09:51
hear what you bridge the gaps and you preach the gaps are the
01:09:55
ones that you bridge the gaps but um the spending each other
01:09:58
not by accepting or agreeing necessarily you just understand it i get it i know where you're coming from
01:10:05
now let's try and me in the middle somewhere and drummer start today with the picture these kids these
01:10:14
uh my kate's you see they grow up this is taking a while back that is what i
01:10:19
look like today they still really belong there amazing on they had had long they are it's incredible
01:10:25
you see these kids here are my living proof that diversity is an advantage let me explain
01:10:31
because i consider it i mean i prefer leech the ah i
01:10:37
can take the best the three cultures and put them in
01:10:40
these gets they all very norwegian there they did being raised in
01:10:44
norway have norwegian possible so they are we each and
01:10:48
but they got quite a bit of british in them as well they've got british they've got the language
01:10:54
they've got this sense of adventure and curiosity
01:10:58
they've got the humour anything go us they've got the
01:11:03
politeness and which on a good day the brits
01:11:07
are really good at the really good really yeah something was there really well still love it yeah
01:11:12
and they've got that self irony and sarcasm as well and it was it got so that's how even then to
01:11:18
you've got the one of the got the extra version they've got the ability to think outside the box
01:11:25
they've got the ability to understand that the word isn't perfect so you do with that
01:11:29
the putting these things in them every day set this model again which i really encourage you go and check at
01:11:36
okay the insides and typical behaviour is in different coaches and hopefully we hope you preach
01:11:41
the gaps but at the end of the it's all about base be curious be
01:11:45
brave respect i just like to finish of the really good film it takes about
01:11:51
a minute and a half i've got a minute half to stay with me
01:11:55
it comes in denmark anywhere from denmark here and the danes great
01:11:58
didn't say thank you straight away to this great movie it's uh it's a movie for t. v. station
01:12:04
the two messages in the t. v. station have a advertisement that first messages watch t. v. two
01:12:10
the second messages in the world we live today where we have a tendency to put each other in boxes
01:12:15
what would the world be like if we started asking
01:12:18
questions instead ask questions be curious be brave
01:12:23
and respect have a look at this little film just it's just as a couple minutes or
01:12:30
right
01:12:34
uh_huh
01:12:36
and there's no
01:12:38
hi
01:12:40
just
01:12:45
trying to avoid
01:12:49
or
01:12:56
now
01:12:58
the religious
01:13:01
oh
01:13:03
some
01:13:06
uh_huh we don't share
01:13:08
right
01:13:10
the comment is probably there
01:13:14
i rather
01:13:17
prior
01:13:20
yeah yeah yeah yeah
01:13:41
wow
01:14:07
oh yeah
01:14:14
oh
01:14:22
oh
01:14:36
we
01:14:40
wow
01:14:44
ah
01:15:03
oh
01:15:12
yeah
01:15:22
alright oh it's a great movie is uh yeah this
01:15:28
is a round of applause absolutely um i think
01:15:33
i think it's an important movie i think the message is really strong look at
01:15:37
the danes they get really really prior to the most is the logo little
01:15:41
and it's just an important message for the world that we live in today at over so my forum
01:15:45
s. issue is basically curious brave respect i've given
01:15:50
you a some tips on the model um
01:15:53
i'm a i'm more than willing to send this to take after some shoulder publish a lot
01:15:57
of this on the website i can make a a condensed version of this presentation
01:16:02
how this is being useful fuelled inspiration of you uh i wish you
01:16:06
well for the rest of the conference thank you very much okay
Conference Program
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 1 - First Time Attendees Introduction Programme (1/2)
Nov. 12, 2017 · 9:24 a.m.
2827 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 1 - First Time Attendees Introduction Programme (2/2)
Nov. 12, 2017 · 11:07 a.m.
131 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 1 - Opening session
Nov. 12, 2017 · 1:05 p.m.
286 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 1 - General assembly
Nov. 12, 2017 · 4:37 p.m.
141 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 2 - Monday Morning Wake up Call
Nov. 13, 2017 · 9:14 a.m.
265 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 2 - Make changes not excuses
Nov. 13, 2017 · 10:47 a.m.
147 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 2 - President’s Choice Session: Collaborative Professionalism: The next knowledge frontier
Prof. Andrew Hargreaves, Brennan Chair in Education, Lynch School of Education
Nov. 13, 2017 · 12:22 p.m.
262 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 2 - Associations in the "Shark tank"
Nov. 13, 2017 · 2:42 p.m.
138 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 2 - “Predatory conferences” – A serious and disturbing danger to international associations and their meetings?
Nov. 13, 2017 · 4:33 p.m.
693 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 3 - Best Marketing Award
Nov. 14, 2017 · 9:06 a.m.
274 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 3 - Bridging the Culture Gap: insights and tools on how to communicate effectively across cultures
Pellegrino Riccardi, Founder, Pellegrino Consulting
Nov. 14, 2017 · 1:50 p.m.
208 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 3 - Shared Cities: Creative Momentum – how to re-imagine cities using a true sharing economy philosophy
Nov. 14, 2017 · 3:35 p.m.
102 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 4 - The Copenhagen Denmark Lecture - 13 questions
Nov. 15, 2017 · 9:04 a.m.
267 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 4 - The Disruptive Art Of Leadership
Miha Pogacnik, Managing Director, ECOCULTURE S.E.C.S.
Nov. 15, 2017 · 10:37 a.m.
134 views
ICCA Congress 2017 Day 4 - Closing Session
Nov. 15, 2017 · 12:08 p.m.
264 views
